He only hurts me when he’s been drinking
3 December 2018
When a man hurts a woman by physically assaulting her, raping her or subjecting her to a torrent of verbal abuse when he has been drinking, he may make the excuse that he did it because he was drunk.
Does he abuse or hit anyone else when he’s drunk? Or is it just his partner or children?
When a man hurts a woman it is because he is making a clear choice to do so – drunk or not.
A man who is abusive may become more dangerous when he is intoxicated but generally if one examines the relationship – patterns of controlling behaviour; extreme distrust; disrespect and anger at the partner are present in sobriety also.
Such a relationship is abusive, and an abusive relationship is not one where the couple “fight” a lot. An abusive relationship is where one person uses bullying tactics to constantly have control in the relationship.
Drink, or drug use, may be aggravating factors – but they are not the reason.
If you or someone you know is experiencing domestic abuse or is affected by any of the issues mentioned above phone COPE Galway Domestic Abuse Service at 091 565 985 (24 hours)