She has a special tenderness with them and is first to tell them they are not alone. Maeve is the epitome of a shining light for anyone needing support to find their way.
Physical, sexual and emotional abuse became predictable and familiar to Maeve. It started at home when she was young.
To escape, Maeve would run for miles. Forbidden to speak out, she remained quiet and alone. In adult life, she became trapped in an extremely abusive marriage which subjected her to years of emotional, financial, sexual, and physical abuse.
Maeve’s partner controlled every aspect of her life. She was rarely allowed to leave the house. He told her what to wear and how to do her makeup. He controlled her finances. He was violent and unpredictable.
For years, she felt imprisoned in her own home. Friends and family that met him thought highly of him, telling Maeve how ‘lucky’ she was.
Maeve has constant reminders of the abuse.
‘He used me as a guinea pig for his tattooing. My body is covered in them, they remind me of him. I wish I didn’t have them. But I couldn’t say no, otherwise he would hurt me.’
At first, Maeve blamed herself for his violent episodes. After many admissions to hospital following suicide attempts, one doctor finally asked her what was going on and she shared some of her situation with him. Instead of patching her up and sending her home, the doctor told her about COPE Galway’s Domestic Abuse Refuge, Modh Eile House.
‘Coming to Modh Eile House, it changed everything. I see now that I was crying out for help. That doctor heard me. So many times before, nobody had.’
Since arriving at Modh Eile House, Maeve is putting herself and her recovery first. Steadily regaining confidence, she now has the space to confront her trauma for the first time. Her recovery isn’t linear; there are days when she still feels scared.
‘Say I spill something, or I forget to make the bed – I am immediately afraid, waiting for something terrible to happen. It’s fear you’re going to get hurt. This fear, it changes you. The abuse feels like it will never leave you. I now know that it will. It won’t be quick – these wounds won’t heal easily. It will take time.’
Maeve now has access to a range of services, protections, and practical supports. The staff team understand, listen, and walk with her through the complex process of recovery. Peer support from other women availing of refuge have helped her realise she is not alone in her experience. This has guided her in becoming a strong self-advocate towards her own independence.
Previously, Maeve had been told what to wear. She now uses fashion to express her vibrant and creative personality.
‘I feel seen here. I realise, I can have nice things for myself; spend some money on myself. And it’s a lovely feeling to know that you are seen as a person, not just a piece of dirt on the ground like I was told. They really listen and they support you here. It’s these things that help you to get back on your feet. I wasn’t even allowed go to the shops before. Now I understand that it’s okay to step outside the door. I have that right.’
Maeve wants to share her story to save lives, the same way she says that Modh Eile House saved hers.
‘I’m getting strong. And do you know what it’s like to be able to get strong? Oh my God, it feels good. I have confidence. Being here, it reminds you that you are somebody. And that is a lovely feeling.’
*To ensure her safety, this client chose to use the name Maeve to protect her identity. Her story captures the indomitable spirit of Queen Maeve, a woman of extraordinary strength and courage. When Queen Maeve’s husband King Ailill teased her for being a woman, she replied: ‘”re you forgetting that I am a leader of warriors? I was well able to defend my kingdom before I married you.“